When God says no.

When God says no, how do you respond? At first, I responded with anger and disappointment but now my response is, God is enough.

Have you ever listened to the song “Your grace is enough” by Matt Maher?

I didn’t really understand the meaning of this song until recently. The phrase “your grace is enough” has a new meaning in my life.

Why? Because even though, God may say no, I will not give you children, His grace is enough for me.

I’ve failed him so many times. Too many to count. You would think by now He’d be done with me. Yet, God takes me back every time and lavishes me with a love that I don’t deserve.

So, I’ve determined in my heart that He is enough. I will love Him even if he says no.

My first treatment of clomid was unsuccessful. It made me feel all types of horrible things in my body. I was constantly cramping, super moody and just not myself. The doctor clearly told me it wouldn’t work but I chose to try it any ways. I am contemplating whether I should try it again, although I hate how it made me feel. Unless God intervenes, our only resort is in vitro. That will probably take a couple of years of saving.

I refuse to be miserable.

I choose Joy.

God is enough.

Photo credit: Arzu Vargas